Augustus the Hungry Kitten: (On annoyances)

"Ze humanz. Zey ask too many questions! 'Vat are you doing, Augustus? Vehr are you going, Augustus? Haf you used ze litter box today, Augustus? Are you a good kitten, Augustus?'

Zese are schtupid questions!!! Vat am I doing??? You are vatching me. Vat does it look like I am doing? Perhaps a BETTER question vud be, 'Vat are your intentions, Augustus?' Zen I vud tell you, 'I am scaling ze great couch mountain! Ven I arrive at ze pinnacle, I vil scout my surroundings for enemies and zen seek to take ovuh ze living room!!!'

Vehr am I going??? I haf NO idea!!! I vil know vonce I haf arrived zer! Vy must I plan efrysing out for you, humanz? Must I submit my daily itinerary in writing? BECAUSE I CANNOT WRITE!!!

Haf you used ze litter box today, Augustus? VY vud you ask me zis?! Zis is NOT an appropriate question to ask! I do not approach you in front of your friends and family and inquire, 'Humanz! Haf you made use of ze excrement box today? I must know now and quite publicly if you haf made a POO!'

And how DARE you even question me on ze amount of my goodness!! I am ze BEST of all kittenz! I DEFY you to find a more noble kitten zan I!

I am going to hide unduh ze luf seat and nap. Ven ze humanz call, 'Vehr ARE you, Augustus?' in zer insulting sing song voice, I vil NOT come out! Zis vil surely teach zem to mind zer own businesses!"